Friday, September 9, 2011

I've started producing music!

Hello all, during summer 2011 I began educating myself in the art of making music using only a laptop. I have an Ep album available for free download on mediafire and a likable facebook page. I go by CX, and I make techno and dubstep, hear my vst plugins roar!!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

The outcast broadcast.

 Amateur graffiti adorns the tan wooden panel walls on the tenements bordering the side of the alley. The humidity of a warm summers eve lightly wafts though the temperate air. The alley itself is paved with worn and graying blacktop riddled with potholes and gravel. Tall grass sporadically trims the edge of a dilapidated wooden fence which surrounds a vacant lot. The streetlight quietly hums and a gentle whoosh from the nearby boulevard cars can be heard whispering its soft lullaby. Broken bottle glass glimmers on the pavement under the streetlight like tiny jewels. A sudden flash from a lighter illuminates a silhouette in the farthest corner of the alley, the faint glow of a cigarette paints the mysterious visage of the man in the corner a faint orange.. Gravel crunches underfoot as the man nervously shifts his feet about and exhales smoke. "Whereabouts 'as that gloopy malchick gotten to?" he mumbled fiddling with his lighter. "No concern o' mine, Nadsies wastin' raz." He thought to himself. He took the cancer stick from his mouth  by the Brillo and looked at it a bit before casting it to the ground and stepping on it. A lone figure cast in shadow staggers towards the man slowly.  "Spare some cutter me brother?" he asked with shame in his eyes. "Oi ya bazoomy bratchny, you'll not be taking none of my pretty polly!", the Man in the corner replied. The vagrant smirked and stumbled his way back out of alley. The grind of bike gears is heard in the distance. "Ah about time!" the man said as he reached into the right pocket of his leather jacket. A
Teenager on a bicycle tore past the streetlight before grinding to a halt next to the man.
"Hiya Marv!" he said gleefully as he hopped off of his bike and pulled his hood up. "Shive that Marv business malchick." Marv said as he pulled a bloodied envelope from his coat pocket. "Here's the document on Officer Turton," Marv said as he handed the teen the envelope,"prinure broke my neck getting it, so don't lose it." A flash of blinding white brilliance erupted from the horizon. A thunderous roar charged through the alley. All was silent-- they had failed.
"Halt!" shouted a masculine voice. "You are breaking curfew, The following arrest is for the protection of your loved ones and yourself." A shadow sifted through the blinding light, slowly manifesting itself as none other than Warrant Officer Turton. "Hello Marv, its been awhile, hasn't it?" Turton said with a smirk before coming to a stop. Marv shuddered and held his ground in response. "Nice work kid." he said as he tossed the teen a parcel. "Glad to oblige sir," The teenager paused to open the package, shifting about anxiously before stating, "I'll be off now." "Of course, leave this scum with us, he won't be bothering anyone again." The teen smiled with bloodlust, re-mounted his bike and sped off.

In the beginning, there was nothing; then there was something: the Earth, the Moon, and the Sun.
God says the rest of the universe is a distraction.
   Meet John, a mild-mannered man about town residing in the small northwestern city of Featherton. Long story short, John's an asshole. It wasn't a choice he made, rather an unlikely combination of genes and unfortunate circumstances. Mainly him selling out his own father in a dark alley. Let us shift our focus onto john's dreams for the time being.
   "Ladies and Gentlemens!" Proclaimed the man in the red jacket and shiny top hat. "Welcome to Die!" he shouted through his waxed mustache in a thick Antartican accent. The stage folded around a giftbox . The antartican man cried out in pain as he was flattened into bloody wrapping paper. The wrapped gift darted into the jet black sky as a disembodied female voice softly says" Hello to the Moon," right before impacting on the frigid surface of the moon, generating a small explosion. The moon in due course, donned an angry face and breathed purple flames from its' nose. Every fruit tree on earth was burned to the ground.
   We now travel to a darkened city where the dysfunction can be felt in the air itself. The pavement beneath your feet pulsates to a tantalizingly hazy beat as you make your way through the multicolor mist of an active night club. Your sight is overwhelmed by the neon glow of every person's jewelry. The heat of every orifice Seems to swirl around your body; you lose focus as you become intoxicated by the humid environment and melt into the crowd of ever-moving bodies-- your head vibrating with the deep techno bass bump. Something awakens inside you, something vicious and dark. The heat around you becomes unbearable, as if your entire person were engulfed by flames. Ebony wings rip out of your back as your let out a horrifying roar and burn club-goers with red beams blasting from your eyes.
  John awakens, shaking violently-- he was having those dreams about Turton again. He groggily sits up in his bed and sits in a stupor for a second, then  looks at the clock and leaps out of bed. "Oh no!" John shouts,"I'm late for church again!" John dashes down his stairs to taste that sweet, sweet caffeine that coffee provides. "What was my sermon going to be about again?" he asked himself as he poured a cup, inadvertently spilling all over the kitchen floor. "Lets see..." John said aloud as he rushed to his closet to grab his suit," If a tree falls on a woman, whats a forest doing in the kitchen?" He paused as he fiddled with his tie."No, that was the opening to last week's sermon on sexism." "No matter how devoted or extremist you are, you are never truly an individual because being unique defines individuality in our culture." he combed his thinning hair and continued: "Therefore, by trying to be unique, you are just like everyone else." John smiled at himself in the mirror, "I'll suck all the joy out of my churchgoers' lives."

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Top 10 things that piss me right the fuck off.

Well i thought i was way overdue for some typical blog bitching, so here we go!

10) When someone ruins a joke by explaining it.
If someone is too slow-witted to get it the first time, explaining it to them a second time will just piss off the people who did get it. It's stupid to do so since you are targeting either one person (hopefully...) and slowing down the pace for their sake to the detriment of everyone elses enjoyment. Remember having to slow down in algebra because three people passing notes or jerking around in class weren't paying attention? Yeah, it sucked ass becuase it made you feel like you were being dragged down to their level.

Which reminds me of:

9) Elitist assholes.
These are the people that equate success with income and happiness with having more, Its a shame that simply believing that is robbing them of the main source of happiness for most people, having friends and /or people that accept you and like you for who you are. Noone really liked that one jocky asshole in highschool that constantly put his fellow athletes down to make himself look better, and nobody likes someone who just constantly brags about the stupid shit they've acquired because of how great they are. They constantly remind you how shitty you are, when in reality,  if they didn't, you'd realize that they have no personality and no real empathy. Theres only one sentence that elitists cant stand to hear: "Who gives a shit?"

8)People who hold 1-sided conversations.
Seriously, fuck off. I'm not going to just sit there and reflect your own bullshit back to you. Especially when I don't give a shit about what you're talking about and never will.

7)People who never shut up about getting "stoned".
While the plant itself is beneficial, you running your mouth about is not. These people have nothing more interesting to add to the conversation other than their antics yesterday, Don't get me wrong, that's perfectly fine as long as: I know you well,you rarely mention it, and if you have some relevant information afterwards.
This goes right back to me hating elitism, They talk about it in a way that sounds like bragging, instead of informing or engaging.

 6)Lesbians that I'm interested in.
Theres nothing more frustrating than finding the perfect girl and having her sexuality shoot you out of the water. You can convert them back to at least bisexual, but its altogether too much work.

5)Being given irrelevant information.
Did you know that Robofish appears in all three timesplitters games? well now you do, and you don't need to know. So while you're left thinking: "what the heck is a robofish?" Your mind is distracted from the task at hand.

4) Fake-ass ice cream.
Theres nothing more disgusting than biting into one of these rancid fudgesickles just to be disapointed by the concoction of what seems to be non-dairy creamer and corn syrup frozen on a stick.

3) People who whine about their life (and don't do anything that promotes positive change)
We all know these sniveling pricks that just can't do anything right in their own eyes. They are natural pessimists and drag everyone else down with them. those assholes. In reality, nothing happens for these people because they aren't even trying.

2) The price of merchandise is rising, while the quality is dropping.
I went to wal-mart the other day, they wanted 20 dollars for a shirt as thin as fucking paper, and it was cotton, not silk or anything like that. Look around you, quantities of meat in restaraunt meals are shrinking while the price goes up and even increases.

1) The Game.
You just lost it.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Hades is allergic to lemons!

Up-and-coming youtube pooper gertelish released never-before seen footage of Hercules.